Wednesday, April 05, 2006
Draft #81
Point-Couterpoint "Societal double standards for men and women"
From the perspective of point, will be Christina Aguilera using only excerpts from her hit single "Can't hold us down" featuring Lil' Kim.
From the perspective of counterpoint, will be rational thought.
Let the debate begin!
Christina: So what am I not supposed to have an opinion. Should I be quiet just because I'm a woman.
Rationale: I'm not exactly sure at what point in our nation's history that women were allowed to speak out of turn, but that date in time has brought our country nothing but considerable headache and drama that has since repressed our advances towards a functional society. And I for one, will not stand idly by and watch the inferior sex tear down, what took our forefathers years to build up. I just won't!
Christina: They call me a bitch because I speak what's on my mind. I guess it's easier for you to swallow if I sat and smiled.
Rationale: I didn't think we would come to an agreement this early in the debate, but Christina brings up a very valid point. Women who speak out against issues they feel are wrong are extremely huge-shut the hell up- don't make me slap you-kiss your mother with that mouth- type bitches. Instead of questioning every single thing male authorities legislate, why not try honing that energy towards refining cooking, cleaning, and knitting skills that the modern woman has abruptly abandoned over the last 50 years? Would it kill you to bake a pie every once in awhile to let your man know you still care?
Christina: When a female fires back, suddenly big-talker don't know how to act. So he does what any little boy would do, making up a few false rumors or two.
Rationale: I continue to stand by my previous statements. I definitely caught you servicing those two homeless gentlemen in the alley near Time Square. I specifically saw a blonde girl, dressed in slutty clothes, wearing an excessive amount of makeup, doing her best randition of a drunken cross-country skier. If that wasn't you, than please, tell me who that possibly could have been.
Christina: Sir, you are for sure, not a man to me, slanderin' names for popularity. It's sad you only get your fame through controversy. But now it's time for me to come and give you more to say.
Rationale: I'm not sure it could get more slutty than handing out HJ's in an alley to strangers? We'd almost prefer you don't give us more to say. For you and your family's sake.
Christina: (now straddling podium) This is for my girls all around the world, who've come across a man who don't respect your worth. Thinking all women should be seen not heard, so what do we do girls? Shout out loud!
Rationale: Through extensive research of the streets within a five mile radius of Time Square, our findings show that Miss Aguilera's "patrons" were charged $3 for an HJ, $10 for a BJ, and $20 for the whole thing. If you're as worried as you appear to be about men not respecting your worth, Miss Aguilera, may I suggest marking up your prices a tad bit higher.
Christina: Let'em know we're gonna stand our ground, lift your hands high and wave them proud. Take a deep breath and say it loud........Never can, never will, can't hold us down.
Rationale: What's with all the shouting?
Christina: If you look back in history, it's a common double standard of society. The guy gets all the glory, the more he can score. While the girl can do the same and yet you call her a whore.
Rationale: Have you ever thought of just not being a whore? It's probably a lot more simple than trying to convince everyone it is OK to be a whore, merely because you're not the only one doing it.
Christina: (with a blank stare that lets everyone know that she's never even given, not being a whore, a second thought) I don't understand why it's OK, the guy can get away with it and the girl gets named. All my ladies come together and make a change, start a new beginning for us everybody sing.
Rationale: Can somebody tell me why we're singing now? This is a debate! Not a ho-down. No pun intended.
Lil'Kim: Check it out, here's something I just can't understand, if a guy have three girls then he da man. He can either give us some head, or sex a roar. If the girl do the same, then she's a whore.
Rationale: I'm pretty sure that's the exact same thing Miss Aguilera has been trying to say for the last few minutes. Is there any point to you being here today?
Lil'Kim: I'm here for all my girls who got a man who be trying to mack. Do it right back to him and let that be that. You gotta let him know that his game is whack, and that Lil'Kim and Christina Aguilera got yo back.
Rationale: Well there you have it. It all started out when we let them have the right to vote and now wouldn't you know it, they want to have sex with whoever, whenever, and however they please. It's like a big whorish snowball that just keeps getting bigger and bigger with no end in sight.
Christina: Oh sir, you're just a little boy, think you're so cute, so coy. You must talk so big, to make up for smaller things.
Rationale: Wait just one second there, missy. My wife is perfectly pleased with........the size.........of a...........Well let's just say she's pleased. At least I think she's pleased. Actually, I hope she is. You don't think she'd lie just to make me feel good. Oh no, she's lying isn't she? I knew it, I'm no good. She's probably doing the mailman as I speak, damn it!
Christina: I am woman, hear me roar!
Rationale: You are a dirty, a dirty whore!
Christina: You just jealous, cuz you can't have this.
Rationale: That's OK, I don't want no syphilis.
Christina: I'm a good, good, girl and I'm as clean as a whistle.
Rationale: There's still no way I'm letting you near, my man-sized pistol.
Christina: I never said, I wanted you
Rationale: That must be a pretty short list, the list of guys Christina won't screw.
Christina: I quit, you win the debate. Just take back the part about women holding back the advancement of society.
Rationale: Deal!
# posted by hucklebuck @ 9:38 AM 
