Monday, December 04, 2006
Draft #168
1. What is your occupation?
-I'd rather not say. It's a bit embarrassing. But..... if you must pry, I am the water boy for the Milwaukee Bucks dance team. With dreams of one day being promoted to the position of locker room towel coordinator.
2. Do you like banana sandwiches?
-I'm pretty sure that's not even a sandwich. Now throw some peanut butter in there, and you've got something.
3. What are you listening to right now?
-I was watching a Larry Bird interview on NBA.com.
4. What was the last thing you ate?
-My lunch consisted of a crab cake, rice, zucchini slices, and milk.
5. Do you wish on stars?
-Like porn stars? Oh...you're probably referring to those self-luminous celestial bodies consisting of a mass of gas held together by its own gravity in which the energy generated by nuclear reactions in the interior is balanced by the outflow of energy to the surface, and the inward-directed gravitational forces are balanced by the outward-directed gas and radiation pressures....... If that is what you are referring to, then no, I don't.
6. If you were a crayon?
-I'd probably huddle up close to the pink crayon that has most of her paper wrapping missing.
7. How is the weather right now?
-It's cold, really cold. I'd range it somewhere between the South pole and witch's tit.
8. Last person you spoke to on the phone?
-Justin. He wanted to make a fantasy football roster change.
9. Do you like the person who sent this to you?
-She's one of the funniest girls I've ever been around.
10. How old are you today?
-I just turned 19 last week. Actually, a wise man once told me that you're only as old as your balls are wrinkled. Which puts me at about 72 years old.
11. Favorite sport to watch?
-It's a tie between European Goat Wrestling and Asian Ping Pong.
12. Have you ever dyed your hair?
-Never. I don't believe in false representation.
13. Do you wear contacts or glasses?
-Both, but never at the same time. That would be stupid, besides, it gives me a headache when I do that.
14. Pets?
-If I wanted something living with me that made unpleasant noises, smelled terribly, and constantly left wet spots on the carpet, I'd have Adam move in with me.
15. Favorite month?
-It has to be July. I mean come on now, you've got Independence Day, Summerfest, my birthday, warm weather, baseball, the lake, cookouts, and blue lagoons.
16. Favorite food?
-I love pizza. I wish somebody would have been keeping a running log of how many I've eaten in my lifetime thus far. And then perhaps my social status would be based on that number. And then in some weird twist of fate, I'd own a yacht.
17. What was the last movie you watched?
-I watched "You, Me, and Dupree" on Friday night. And I'll have to admit, Kate Hudson looks better in underwear than I do.
18. Favorite day of the year?
-Any day in which I receive pizza coupons in the mail.
19. Coke or Pepsi?
-I usually try to avoid drinking soda for the most part, but for the sake of the questionaire I'll admit to thinking Pepsi tastes the best. But....unfortunately I always buy Coke because I like the packaging better. And...Corporate America planted a chip into my brain at a young age so I'm medically and socially inclined to prefer Coke. That.....and I have a taste for rum and polar bears.
20. What do you do to vent anger?
-Vent anger? You have to keep that bottled up, that's what I do. If you went around swearing at everybody just to let off some steam the man would come and take you away to the loony bin. If you don't believe me, just ask my uncle Pete, he'll tell ya.
21. What was your favorite toy as a child?
-My WWF action figures. I had the ring and everything. My Liono (Thundercats) action figure was a close second.
22. Fall or Spring?
-I have yet to experience either, I live in Wisconsin. We have summer, and then 3 degrees of winter (the unexpected early winter, winter, and the painfully slow end of winter).
23. Hugs or kisses?
-It depends who's doing it and where it's being done.
24. How many kids and Grand-kids?
-My 72 year old balls have yet to bear any fruit.
25. Do you want your friends to email you?
-In lieu of electronic mail respones, please send cash.
26. Who is most likely to respond?
-I don't think any of you are stupid enough to send cash, but it would be nice if you did.
27. Living arrangements?
-I have clock radio, need I say more?
28. When was the last time you cried?
-It was after Tiffani Amber Thiessen and I first broke up. I was devastated!
29. What is on the floor of your closet?
-Shoes and some dust bunnies.
30. Who is the friend you have had the longest?
-Definitely Buckwheat. Friends who have bathed together, stick together.
31. What are you afraid of?
-Most Taco Bell employees, salmonella, snakes, clowns, and people who can drink half a bottle of whiskey in one evening without dying.
32. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburger?
-I like spicey cheeseburgers with bacon. Plain? Who eats a hamburger plain without being repressed by some totalitarian form of government? That's no way to live damn it!!
32b.Would you eat a hot dog if it was shaped like a hamburger?
-Why would I want to eat a bologna sandwich? Only inmates and overwhelmingly poor people eat bologna.
33. Favorite car?
-I'm really not into cars. As long as it gets me from A to B and doesn't brake down constantly.
34 Favorite dog breed?
-I'm partial to miniature weiner dogs.
35. Number of keys on your key ring?
-Counting the key for my human-sized birdcage? About 6 then.
36. How many years at your current job?
-A year and a half of dealing with people who answer "either/or" questions by responding with a yes. It's been fabulous.
37. How many cities have you lived in?
-Two. West Bend and Milwaukee.
38. Place you most want to travel to?
-Wherever the pizza flows like peanut butter and banana sandwiches, just off the coast of hamburger shaped hot dogville.
# posted by hucklebuck @ 10:55 AM 
Comments:
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Hucklebuck, I stole this survey and posted it with my answers on my blog. Please forgive me. I'm trying to procrastinate as I have two papers due Wednesday. It seemed like fun.
Don't like to give false representation? I beg to differ, Hucklebuck. You use a pseudonym for your blog, and not your real name. Shenanigans!
July is an excellent month, except for when your friends girlfriend's mom yells at you for no reason and then you leave the fourth of July party early, then everyone feels bad, or you get punched in the eye.
Blue lagoons, excellent.
July is an excellent month, except for when your friends girlfriend's mom yells at you for no reason and then you leave the fourth of July party early, then everyone feels bad, or you get punched in the eye.
Blue lagoons, excellent.
Rat & Ola- I have no idea what you guys are talking about. Most of your assumptions are based on a couple of razor burns I incurred while shaving and nothing else.
Lauren- I'm glad to assist in procastinating whenever possible.
Nate- The main reason I left the party early had more to do with the massive deuce I had coming on the horizon that morning than it did Michelle's mom. I didn't feel like stanking up a household I had previously only visited a couple of times. The rest of the day, I would have been that guy, the guy who stank up the entire house or worse yet, clogged the crapper. I'm more prone to taking care of that type of business on my home turf than I am on the road. You could say it's part of my Southern charm.
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Lauren- I'm glad to assist in procastinating whenever possible.
Nate- The main reason I left the party early had more to do with the massive deuce I had coming on the horizon that morning than it did Michelle's mom. I didn't feel like stanking up a household I had previously only visited a couple of times. The rest of the day, I would have been that guy, the guy who stank up the entire house or worse yet, clogged the crapper. I'm more prone to taking care of that type of business on my home turf than I am on the road. You could say it's part of my Southern charm.
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