Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Draft #172
Weekend Review
Friday: I spent the evening at Pat G's house watching the Badger hockey team defeat North Dakota 4-3. Stack and Haus were also in attendance and we all had the privilege of watching Pat nearly lop one of his fingers off while attempting to cut up a green pepper for his world renown chili. Speaking of the chili, if you've never fried up 20 lbs of pork sausage I recommend you do sometime, the aroma is absolutely exhilarating. (This message was brought to you by the good people at Lindsay Foods, Inc.---The one stop shop for all your meat and meat related needs!)
Watching Pat prepare a chili feast proved to be quite an exhausting endeavour, so Haus, Kurt, and I decided to down an entire bottle of Captain to help spell the tide. After a couple of Brooklyn Style Pizzas from Dominos, it was time to pass out.
Saturday: We gussied ourselves up bright and early for a hearty breakfast down at the Old Sawmill Inn in hopes of seeing our favorite waitress, Carol. On the way over I offered anyone in our car $20 if they would slap Carol in the ass after placing their order, and as it turned out, not one of them stepped up to the plate and pulled out the unthinkable (it didn't help that Carol wasn't working that particular day either).
Disclaimer *--The good people at Lindsay Foods, Inc. do not condone the deplorable and insensitive act of sexual harrassment under any circumstances--*
It turned out Haus was the last person to receive his food, a calculated act that Pat perceived as a payback for the boot-shaped mug that Haus stole from the Sawmill last year.
Disclaimer*--The good people at Lindsay Foods, Inc. do not condone the thoughtless act of stealing merchandise under any circumstances--*
During breakfast we had an interesting conversation as to what the breakfast equivalent to a corn dog is called, ie--an oversized breakfast sausage link on a stick wrapped in pancake batter as opposed to a hot dog on a stick wrapped in cornmeal. The majority at the table were convinced, without reason, that it is referred to as "a pig in a blanket". I on the other hand do not buy that theory. I thought it was called something else, but I wasn't sure what. Maybe something along the lines of "Lumber Flap Jack Sticks" or "Paul Bunyan's Breaded Breakfast Boners". Pigs in a blanket doesn't seem specific enough for me, that could apply to any pork product wrapped in a breading of sorts. Perhaps this is a mystery to which there lies no answers? Or perhaps I am an idiot of a magnitude not yet defined?
Disclaimer*--The good people at Lindsay Foods, Inc. do not participate in the practice of referring to particular cuts of meat as male reproductive organs. While they do admit that certain cuts of meat like brats and Italian sausages do draw a similar resemblence to the male organ, they are also professional enough to realize that such comparisons are infantile and inappropriate.--*
After breakfast it was back to Pat's to watch the Marquette/Badgers game. As you all know by now the Badgers ended up winning the game in convincing fashion, thus ruining the lives of Marquette fans everywhere. Luckily for me I have no extreme emotional ties to one school or the other, but I did however have a bit of a financial stake in the matter, a stake that I ended up profiting off of to the tune of five whole dollars. Permission to submit the "Boo" and the "Yah", in that order.
In an effort to make sure I spelled boo-yah correctly I stumbled across an urban dictionary that explained the phrase boo-yah in a number of ways. Pay particular attention to the first definition provided at:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=boo-yah
Disclaimer*--The good people at Lindsay Foods do not condone giving your girlfriend or significant other a boo-yah under any circumstances.--*
Once the Sheepshead games begin at the Graven residence that's my cue to leave because A) Only 55-72 year olds find that game fascinating and B) I'd rather be ravaged by a wild pack of rabid wildebeest than to have to sit through more than 5 seconds of that game. If you think that game is fun then go ahead and do yourself a favor and take up knitting as a hobby because you're already leaning on that fence, so just do it. I'm sorry, that's just the way I feel.
After leaving Pat's with a belly full of chili it was off to Grafton to witness one of the greatest sporting venues to ever hit this state, of course I'm referring to Blizzard Brawl II.
Since I'm running out of time, just a few random thoughts about the event:
-Chugging cans of High Life in a bus between matches really heightens the wrestling experience.
-Tito Santana and King Kong Bundy are out of shape.
-Bobby the Brain Heenan is extremely skinny and looks like he's on the brink of death.
-Doink the Clown wrestled in the main event.
-I started a "Tito" chant that got the whole gym rocking.
-I took a picture of a guy in the crowd because his shirt was so bad.
# posted by hucklebuck @ 9:09 AM 
Comments:
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Wow, who knew that my affliction would make me the prototype for the boo-yah maneuver...............and what's wrong with knitting?
I'm with you on the pigs-in-a-blanket thing, Andy, although not because "pigs-in-a-blanket" is such a general term, but because I think pigs-in-a-blanket don't have sticks in them. Stuff wrapped around piece of wood is definitely something else; Jimmy Dean uses the term Pancakes & Sausage on a stick.
Zannah, welcome back! If I had a million dollars I'd fly to France right now and cook us up a couple of Pancakes & Sausages on a stick, then get stinking drunk off a bottle of French wine and let you take advantage of me. I believe they refer to that as "romance" --Jimmy Dean style.
(I couldn't even comprehend the level of gut rot one would suffer through by downing Jimmy Dean products and wine at the same time)
(I couldn't even comprehend the level of gut rot one would suffer through by downing Jimmy Dean products and wine at the same time)
Pat, I had trouble figuring out what cutting your finger had to do with a boo-yah, but then I remembered your MAIN affliction and then it all started making sense.
Knitting is for sissy pants.
Knitting is for sissy pants.
Yeah, Big Naked Nate walks to the beat of a different drummer...
...a drummer that's consumed way too much whiskey.
...a drummer that's consumed way too much whiskey.
Hey now, Nate nor BNN industries promote the consumption of whiskey by anyone named Nate or BNN. It's either beer, captain, vodka, or soco for this guy. (and I know soco is a sweet whiskey, but you know what I mean)
How foolish of me. I was thinking of soco when I said whiskey if that counts for anything?
We all know how Big Naked Nate rolls.
We all know how Big Naked Nate rolls.
Mr. Hucklebuck's comment about Nate walking to the beat of a different drummer had nothing to do with Nate's drinking preferences. The drummer who provides the beats is the one who preferred whiskey, not Nate.
In case you're wondering, Johnny Technicality has absolutely no friends because he's always pointing out everybody's faults.
In case you're wondering, Johnny Technicality has absolutely no friends because he's always pointing out everybody's faults.
# posted by 
: 12:02 PM
: 12:02 PM
Johnny Technicality's misunderstood yet passionate love for all things Star Wars doesn't make him very popular with the ladies either.
That and my plush unibrow.
That and my plush unibrow.
# posted by : 12:15 PM
: 12:15 PM
Welcome back? The hell...? I check your blog all the time; there just aren't always issues as pressing as the definition of pigs in a blanket to comment on.
Hmmmm... "Romance" by Jimmy Dean. Do you think it'd smell like ham?
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Hmmmm... "Romance" by Jimmy Dean. Do you think it'd smell like ham?
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