Friday, February 16, 2007
Draft #183
Freestyle Fridays (Serving both red and blue Kool-Aid)
-Domino's has just released a Cheesy Garlic Bread Pizza. I believe the concept for this pizza is as follows: They take a normal medium pizza, dip it into a large drum of the buttery garlic sauce that comes with every Papa John's pizza, sprinkle some extra cheese on top and wallah.....you have the greasiest pizza to ever hit the market. They should have a guarantee that states if you don't get at least 5 extra zits within 5 minutes of eating this product, you get your money back.
-Speaking of greasy pizza, the greasiest pizza I ever ate was in Gatlinburg, Tennessee. My family and I were on vacation and we stopped at a Pizza Hut on the main strip. After successfully choking down a pan pizza, Haus, Pops, and I were amazed at the amount of grease this pie contained. We were almost put off by how saturated it was, and I repeat "almost". With our meal complete we scanned the room over while sipping the last of the soda. Dad noticed that a small family had just exited the restaurant and had left a half a pizza behind. He asked a waitress if it would be possible for her to box up the remains of the stranger's pizza for us because "our dog Sparky" just loves pizza. She of course willing boxed up the leftover pizza and the Ballbach boys finished up the free pizza while strolling down the strip, much to the disgust of mother.
-Speaking of disgusting my mother....back in my little league days my mom was watching one of my games from a picnic bench near the on-deck circle of my team's dugout. While I was at the on-deck circle swinging or stretching or whatever it is players do at the on-deck circle, my mom was explaining to a parent seated next to her that I was her son and blah, blah, blah. Apparently while my mom was pointing out who I was, I let one rip in the middle of a practice swing. It was loud enough for both my mom and whoever she was conversing with to hear (in my defense I get quite gassy when I'm nervous). On the way home after the game my mom said she was never so embarrassed in her life.
-I was in Madison recently and here's some bullet points from that weekend:
~Brother's was selling pitchers of beer for only $2 a piece last Saturday afternoon. Consequently I became quite drunk. Drunk enough that during the hockey game that evening I was willing to run up and down the aisle of our section in order to high five everyone at the end of their row after each goal scored. Yes, I was that guy.
~The morning after we headed to the International House of Pancakes for some breakfast. I.....having recently finished some Ian's pizza from the night before was not hungry for breakfast so I decided to order the bowl of fruit, something to keep me occupied so I wasn't just staring at everybody else while they ate. It turned out that my minuscule bowl of musk melon and cantaloupe cubes with a spattering of grapes cost $6.99. It's as if they almost promote obesity at this place for crying out loud. I could have gotten a nine-egg omelete, 2 pots of coffee, a whole pig, and a medium stack of pancakes for half that price. That was an outrage!! On the way out Adam said, "I bet you can't eat this pancake in one bite." So I folded that flapjack twice without blinking and shoved it in the old cakehole. It took me the walk from our booth to the front entrance to finish it and I looked like Dizzy Gillespie exiting the joint, but I did it.
-If you're reading this blog for the first time I'm not exactly painting a very pretty picture of myself. I swear I'm much more than a flatulence passing alcoholic who bums food off of other people. I swear. At least I hope so. Oh goodness, sad realization settling in, accept or deny.
-How come the orange juice I usually purchase claims to be "Not From Concentrate" yet suggests I shake well for fresh squeezed taste? Sounds fishy.
-It was Febtoberfest Eve and all through the night
Filzen was frantically counting
All the cans of Miller and Bud Light
The keg was strategically placed
In the bathtub with care
In hopes that cousin Jon
Won't pass out right there
He glanced through the guestlist
And all the names warmed his heart
Even a Janke soaked mattress
Couldn't break this party apart
Come one and come all
To the chateau in the Falls
We'll eat and we'll drink
And later on Nate might show us his balls
Febtoberfest number two
Is but a few hours away
The anticipation is building
Just ask BMA
So to you Mr. Filzen
What more can we say
Here's to Febtoberfest
And a Happy Birthday!
# posted by hucklebuck @ 7:29 AM 
Comments:
<< Home
Just before reading your post, I saw the commercial for the new Domino's pizza, and I fell in love. It's buttery, garlic-y, and cheesy. What more can you ask for? I love cheese. And pizza. And the more cheese on pizza the better. Especially when butter and garlic are involved.
I agree with you as far as how great pizza is, but this particular one looks like it would take half a roll of Brawny paper toweling just to soak up the pool of grease that is swimming on top of it.
Since it's new and it's pizza I probably will try it but I'm also prepared to take a bath immediately afterwards.
-Andy
Post a Comment
Since it's new and it's pizza I probably will try it but I'm also prepared to take a bath immediately afterwards.
-Andy
# posted by 
: 7:27 AM
: 7:27 AM << Home
